May our sons in their youth be like plants full grown, our daughters like corner pillars cut for the structure of a palace. Psalm 144:12

Am I accepted? Am I loved? Am I lovable? As a young girl experiences the sometimes confusing and foreign changes in her body that prepare her for womanhood, the hidden heart of every teen-age girl cries out for affirmation. As a 13-year-old who was taller than the boys in my class and a bit too round around the middle, I had a sense that I didn’t measure up. Complaining to my mother one day about my unhappiness with my appearance, I must have caught her flat-footed. After a long pause (too long, only confirming my worst suspicions), she said, “Well, Karen, you’re just stately.” Not what I wanted to hear.

In His wisdom, God entrusted children to imperfect moms and dads who sometimes miss the mark. They were not entrusted to schools, the professionals, tutors at the local library; nor to their peers; and not even to the church youth group. It is His design that children be nurtured in a family as (amazingly) Jesus was.

Parenting is particularly challenging as we help our children navigate social media and the plethora of ideas offered for finding happiness by re-creating one’s identity. One of parents’ greatest means of support is the privilege of prayer on behalf of their children: prayer that they grow as Jesus did – in wisdom and stature and favor with God and man; prayer that God will keep them from destructive habit patterns and lifestyles, and soften their hearts to truth; and prayer that, as parents, truth will be offered with grace and love.

And grandparents, while our days of parenting may be over, we have a role to play, too. I count it a great privilege to pray specific prayers for each of my five grandchildren one day of the week. I am praying that each will flourish in accordance with their unique giftedness for the glory of God and that they will have an aversion to evil.

Mindful of God’s loving acceptance of them (even when in a disheveled state), parents can extend that same kind of loving acceptance to their children. Jesus never shunned people in distress, but reached out to them with love and compassion. Parental love reminds the young woman struggling with self-doubt that she belongs, that she is treasured, and that she is beautiful, keeping the door open to addressing the real issues – the ones she is holding deep in her heart.

While these conversations can’t be hurried, the real cry of the hidden heart is to know the love and goodness of her Creator and His intentions for her as a young woman. We were made FOR God. As St. Augustine said, “The human heart is restless until it rests in Thee.” God was delighted to form her in His divine image, capable of representing Him well on earth. Male and female He created them. (Genesis 1:27) On the day of her birth, her Maker pronounced her “Very good.” Every cell of her being is female. The Psalmist wrote, For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works. … How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them. (Psalm 139:13-17)

In a sense my mother had it right. “Being stately” is what our God wants young girls to grow into, becoming women who reflect His beauty, goodness, and grace. As a young teen, I was aiming low; I wanted to be popular; I would have settled for an adjective like “cute.” These days our young people often find their worth in the number of likes accrued from their social media post. God’s perspective is much higher. He has crowned humans with glory and honor (Psalm 8:5) and formed us as a beautiful dwelling place, a temple for His Holy Spirit.

Scripture often exhorts us to tell the next generation.

How will you prepare yourself for the opportunities God opens up for you to talk about the created order and His divine appointments? For whom are you praying? And who will you tell?

One of the important equipping resources offered by Hidden Heart Ministry is their 8-week course, The Cry of the Hidden Heart now being offered online. We also recommend, “Love Thy Body” by Nancy Pearcey as an excellent resource.