When the Spark is Gone (Part 2)


“One morning, you’ll wake up and see the person  you’ve married and wonder what you’ve done.” Our pastor gave us this scary warning in premarital counseling. We laughed knowing that would never happen to us. Until it did. 

Where did the spark go? Now what do we do?

As I shared in the last post, a romantic spark is the intoxicating, combustible ignition that starts a relationship. It is the force that helps a man and a woman decide to give up a life of self-service and commit to one of lifelong full-service.

Think of a space shuttle. The romantic spark is like the rocket boosters, filled with solid fuel, propelling the massive plane through earth’s gravity. After two minutes, the boosters fall away and the shuttle runs on liquid fuel to power the rest of the mission. Once the initial spark sputters, what FUELS a marriage?

God invented marriage so let’s look in His love letter, the Bible, to find its power source. Here is God’s FUEL for marriage:

F – Forgiveness: Jesus wants his followers to forgive as He does.

“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13

U – Understanding: Husbands, this is what your wife wants for Valentine’s Day, even more than chocolate!

“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.” I Peter 3:7

E – Esteem (to set a high value on: regard highly and prize accordingly): Our turn! Wives … wrap some “esteem” up in lingerie to re-charge your man!

“… they (husbands) may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful (ESTEEM) and pure conduct.” I Peter 3:1b-2

L – Love: Not yours God’s love. Human love sparks and sputters. God’s love never runs out. And it is ours for the asking. Choose to put His love on.

“And over all these virtues put on love (agape – my word for the year!), which binds them all together in perfect unity.” Colossians 3:14

This Valentine’s Day, celebrate the love of God that fuels His good gift of marriage. Ask the Holy Spirit to re-fill your love tank so that your marriage is a gravity-defying marvel for you to enjoy and all to see.

Mary SuzanneSignatureRGB